Football transfer rumours: Milos Krasic to Manchester United?

On this day in 1969, the 50-pence coin came into circulation for the very first time, replacing the 10 shilling note ahead of decimalisation. The world’s first heptagonal unit of currency, the 50p was nevertheless instantly branded by the British public as being too similar to the 10p piece, despite having six more sides than that coin, which being round had only one long, smooth never-ending side, as opposed to the 50p’s pointy, jagged seven. In many ways it is comforting to know our forefathers, confused into penury by a rank inability to differentiate between simple shapes, were as downright stupid as we all are today.

Anyway, it’s not much, but there’s a wee tale to take away with you from today’s Rumour Mill so you haven’t completely wasted your time, because these rumours are beyond tarting up.

Manchester United want the Juventus winger Milos Krasic.

Arsenal are making plans to sign the Udinese winger Gabriel Torje, who has been “dubbed” the Ian Olney of the Carpathians the Romanian Lionel Messi.

Sunderland, West Bromwich Albion and Liverpool are all interested in the PSV Eindhoven striker Ola Toivonen, who will cost 18,000,000 50p pieces.

Mark Robins is to become the new Bristol City manager.

QPR want the Celtic striker Gary Hooper. The Glasgow giants are quite happy to accept the transfer fee in loose change, but only if it’s all bagged up properly, ten quid’s worth in each one. QPR will be needing 700,000 bags, by our reckoning.

Aston Villa are interested in the Hoffenheim midfielder Gylfi Sigurdsson, formerly of Reading.

Bournemouth are in for the Coventry striker Freddy Eastwood.

And Steve Cotterill will become the new boss of Nottingham Forest, but only if Portsmouth receive £300,000 in compo. York City’s Gary Mills is being lined up should Pompey refuse to accept all that shrapnel, which they’re within their rights to do, even though it is legal tender.

Article source: http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2011/oct/14/football-transfer-rumours-milos-krasic

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